Chag sameach!
Ten signs you might be at a Republican seder:
10. They refuse to answer the four questionswithout a subpoena.
9. They demand a recount of the ten plagues.
8. They defend not increasing the minimum wageon the grounds that according to Chad Gadyait still costs only two zuzzim to buy a goat.
7. The afikomen is hidden in the Cayman Islands.
6. They refuse to open the door for Elijahuntil they see his immigration papers.
5. They attack Moses for negotiating a deal with Pharoahbecause why would we negotiate with our enemies?
4. They don't understand why the Egyptians didn’tcure the plagues with hydroxychloroquine.
3. They omit the parts about slavery from the Haggadahbecause it reminds them of Critical Race Theory.
2. They keep saying “when do we get tothe miracle of the Jewish space lasers?”
And the number one sign that you might beat a Republican seder:
1. They end the seder by singing"Next year in Mar-a-Lago."
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Nice you must be or delete your ass I will.